Thursday, January 10, 2008

Insomnia

It must be because I have a lot to think about and not much time to do so, because these past holidays absolutely exhausted me. And yet, the moment my head hits the pillow, the race is on. There's music playing in the background. I have several conversations with myself, at the same time. And then I begin to review every time I ever humiliated myself in front of another person -- the midnight march of shame! Happily, though, I'm too busy to fully enter the abyss.

My first day of teaching is tomorrow and I am woefully unprepared. I had to go to meetings all week, including one very blood pressure raising one, and a lot of other work to do. For the first day, I want to do something fun. One benefit (or drawback) of teaching where I do, noone drops so it's not like I need to scare anybody off. Perhaps I'll do mad libs with poetry. We'll see and I'll report back.

On the plus side, I'm getting very excited by my manga article that I've talked about here before. I've learned a lot. Also, I've been invited to join the board of the journal, Mechademia. This is really great news and I'm deeply honored. However, since I'll be working on submissions, it's kinda weird having one of my own pieces in the system, knowing that all the other people I work with have the chance to read, comment, and accept/reject. Thankfully, I won't see it (now can you see why I'm anxious?).

7 comments:

K. A. Laity said...

You start on a Friday? How weird! Hope it's going okay. We start Monday -- ayiiiiiiiii! Not ready.

I know the anxious feeling. For me it's usually the 4am feeling. Nothing feels quite as hopeless as that time. Everything I've ever done stinks, there is no hope that anything good will be accomplished, why did I ever bother trying. It's brutal.

Congratulations on the invite to Mechademia -- it's a real vote of confidence in your abilities. Can't wait to see your manga essay. I know I'll learn a lot from it if you're even learning things, 'cause you know waaaaay more than me about it.

Elena Steier said...

Hey, congratulations! I too am looking forward to reading your article.

I used to be a pretty bad insomniac. Now I'm a not so bad insomniac. I've found a sure cure to sleeplessness: watching c-span on my notebook computer while sacking out on the coach. There's nothing like listening to a bloviating senator to put one's brain cells into a restful, sleep submissive state.

K. A. Laity said...

I should make you a copy of the Egg of Time CD -- I believe it's long out of print. Very soothing and relaxing when played at a just barely audible level.

Elena Steier said...

More soothing than a congressman pontificating on economic policy? Wow. Impressive.

The Queen said...

Congrats on the Mechademia invite!

And I'll read your manga essay - after all, you managed to find poetry I actually enjoyed, so there's hope for me liking manga someday.....

Cranky Yankee said...

The only thing that keeps me awake at night is the damn rat under my floorboards with its loud chewing noises.

Think the landlord would mind if I pull up the floorboards and go hunting?

Wendy said...

Thanks for the comments. I think that I just needed a couple mornings where I didn't need to get up. I feel much better after this weekend.